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How to Write a 20 Page Paper in One Weekend April 21, 2008

Posted by amberpeace in Uncategorized.
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Amber’s guide to driving yourself towards a complete breakdown

1. Ignore the fact that graduate school involves about ten times more reading than undergrad ever did.

2. Check facebook

3. Do not learn your lesson from the last time you wrote a paper, and put it off until the night before.

4. Check facebook

5. When you set a schedule for yourself, do not follow it.

6. Blog

7. Go to sleep at 2am when you mean to go to sleep at 11pm. Wake up at 11am when you mean to wake up at 8am, so that you can’t possibly do the amount of work in a day that you mean to do.

8. Read blogs.

9. Find random errands that you don’t actually need to do

10.Start a list like this.

11. Pretend you are coming up with new and inventive ways to study.

12.Take a political quiz

13. Let a friend interrupt you

14.Ask ChaCha if you have time to write the paper

15. Get a cold.

16. Remind yourself of your obligation to the Eucharist and attend church.

17. Check facebook

18. Go to the opera and act surprised when it lasts more than two hours

19.Go to Sonic

20.Call your friend after getting burned

21.Make flair

FINISH PAPER (kinda) at 5:59am

Mix liberally with gin and serve in a stuffy attic. Repeat until desired results are obtained.

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Comments»

1. kat - April 21, 2008

ha. the best papers are always written under pressure like that. i’d rather stress about not having it done than getting it done early and stress over whether or not it should be changed.

i think we do that to ourselves on purpose.

2. kate5kiwis - April 22, 2008

lol that facebook is such an alluring void.
i also think that even though we give ourselves the guilts for “procrastinating”, a lot of thinking/planning/sifting/preparatory “doing” is going on under the surface of the procrastinating. and when we finally get to the Eleventh Hour *bam!* it all happens…..
mwah X

3. Libby - April 22, 2008

I’ve a paper due next week. I’ll be printing out this post and following your instructions! 😉

4. Amber Lee - April 22, 2008

That gin is a key ingredient


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